Few words fill me with more dread than, “Please enter your username and password.”
Like many of you, I have my computer set to remember all of login credentials, so why is it when I get the occasional request to re-enter the username and password details, I draw a blank? Far too many times, I enter the information I think is correct, only to get that annoying red text: “Your username and password is incorrect. Please try again. My password-protected life is making me paranoid.
I hadn’t used my computer for ages and when using what I thought was the ‘correct’ password I invariably got it wrong. Not to worry. The password reminder KeepassX would help me out. Not. Passwords used to make sense when I used the same one for umpteen sites. but Young John, the family computer expert, explained the error of my ways. Now they are all different and sometimes resemble a shopping list crossed with an animal safari in the North of England: Orange.easy peeler.castle.goat10
COMPUTER: Please enter your new password.
COMPUTER: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.
ME: boiled cabbage
COMPUTER: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
ME: 1 boiled cabbage
COMPUTER: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.
COMPUTER: Sorry, the password must contain at least one uppercase character.
COMPUTER: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one uppercase character consecutively.
COMPUTER: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.
COMPUTER: Sorry, that password is already in use.
When I inevitably get my password wrong, and the KeepassX reminder fails to work, that glaring red error message can be infuriating. When it happens, I know I likely have a limited number of attempts before I’m locked out, so often I’ll click the link that reads, ‘forgot my password.’ But in the minutes that pass as I wait for an email to reset my account, anger begins to build. The only thing I can compare this feeling to is when my blogposts are ignored or I can’t find my glasses. Am I alone in this log-in fueled fury? Is there such a thing as ‘password rage?’
Bad for Me?
Okay, okay. I know for somebody like me this can be detrimental to my overall health and well-being. Dave tells me that the best thing I can do in this situation is leave the computer and go and make a coffee for Mrs. John. Easier said than done. My inclination is to move closer the problem and try to resolve it.
All of this anger is pretty bad for the body. As testosterone gets pumping, blood pressure increases and the brain generates a flurry of negative emotions. With every angry outburst, the risk of stroke, aneurysm, or heart attack creeps upward. So what can I do? Experience with my phone thumbprint doesn’t work efficiently and is a waste of time. I know. I’ll take a leaf out of Mrs John’s book and make a note my passwords on a piece of paper. Cracked it! Now for that well-earned cup of coffee.
This has been a metal detector-free zone.